From Rejection To Motivation

The Story To My Name

While I was in primary school, my teacher once scolded me for talking during assembly. It was my friend who was chattering away. Being scolded for an “error” I didn’t make felt unjust. I’ll never forget what that teacher said: “Basrah Bee! Busy chatting like a bee”. I grew up despising my given name. It was amusing to see how others mocked it. And the fact that it didn’t make a lot of sense. “Basrah Isn’t it? As in the Iraqi city?” 

It was devoid of any actual meaning. But, hopefully, a fantastic narrative. One that I inherited from my late grandmother (No, that’s not it. She wasn’t Iraqi in the first place either). When I was born, my father was reminded of her (a fact I used to question because I had four sisters before me) — Why me? But I want to think of myself as special.

My name is Basrah Bee, like the Iraqi city. And yes, just like the Bee.

My Background

My schooling years were spent with a single goal in mind: to get into medical school. I was raised as a typical A student. My school’s head prefect. I became involved in extracurricular activities such as the student council and volunteered in my community. I shadowed General Practitioners. While many choose to study for A-levels. I had to take the road less traveled and majored in Biomedical Sciences, where I fell in love with working in a hospital laboratory. Dealing with biological specimens was a lot of fun. However, I yearned for the human side of medicine. I worked at the National Heart Centre in Singapore after finishing my diploma. Interacted with a range of cardiologists and cardiac patients. I realized then, that I can’t imagine myself doing anything other than medicine. People have joked that I live up to my name. “Basrah Bee, Busy working like a bee” 

Until , I didn’t get into medical school. Twice.

It was excruciating to be rejected. The battle scars, on the other hand, are something I’m proud of. It demonstrates how much I desired to pursue my dream. I persisted in my goals and eventually found myself in Medan. The only country that would accept me and my little dream. I am fortunate to have the opportunity to study medicine in an Islamic country. I’d like to live somewhere where I could combine Islam with science. (I enjoy blogging about it as well!)

My journey was not without flaws and sacrifices — like quitting my part-time teaching job, downsizing to just my luggage, and being far away from home. Adapting to a new country was another level of brutal. I lost friends and missed out on special occasions such as weddings, birthdays, and bidding farewells to those who had passed away. Then there’s the reality that I’ll never be able to contribute back to the country I love because I won’t be able to practice with my qualifications at home.

Learning medicine in an underdeveloped country on the other hand, is humbling. It makes you think about those who don’t have access to medicine. You can see how restricted resources affect healthcare. And, as much as I want the most cutting-edge technology or the most incredible facilities, these are the people who require more assistance. And I learned to value the finer things that I have, back home.

It has been three years. Nonetheless, everyday continues to be a journey of acceptance.

My Motivation

In the midst of COVID-19 outbreak, I was attempting to get over the disappointment of being rejected by my dream school. The lockdown taught me the value of diversifying my sources of income. Naturally, the prospect of earning a passive income appealed to me. Add on the notion of working as a doctor in a third-world country. I didn’t want money to be a source of stress. I write, to find alternative ways to earn so that I may keep doing what I love — medicine — without money being a primary goal. I immediately discovered however, that writing is not the way to go if you’re wanting to make cash.

So why did I stay?

Academic writing has always bothered me. It felt dry and intimidating. Something a little more relaxed appealed to me. One that the general public would like. My long-term ambition is to be a physician and author like Atul Gawande and Oliver Sacks. I’m writing today to learn more about what it takes to be a medical writer and run a successful blog. In that process, I learnt that I could also write to heal and help others. It changed my life and allowed me to find meaning in my suffering.

Since my work on Medium is not easily accessible to those without a membership, I started an interactive writing newsletter to engage with more folks back home. Sign up for my newsletter. You won't miss anything because each new version of the newsletter will be delivered directly to your mailbox.

My Commitment

When you sign up for this newsletter, you'll get access to a variety of resources that I hope, could be of value to you.

There's The Weekly Pause for starters. Each week, we'll focus on one of my personal development or medical school anecdotes that I hope would be worth pausing for. You'll get questions to help you apply my tale to your daily life, as well as writing prompts to help you improve as a person.

Finally, I aim to scale up till you'll have access to a weekly Zoom Meeting where we'll talk about our triumphs and struggles as we go through our travels together. I'd want to create an exclusive podcast where I can assist you to learn how to move over pain and trauma in order to have a better and healthier student life.

I'm ecstatic to get started with you!